7 years

Happy Anniversary! I'm not quite sure how I feel about 7 years of marriage. In a lot of ways I can't believe it's been 7 years. I can remember my single days so well. I have been reflecting on my wedding day...that seems like a blur. I remember bits and pieces. I remember going over to my cousin Kim's house and she did my hair. Then getting into my dress and driving myself to the temple for pictures. Paul met me in the parking lot, he was nervous I won't show up. Then I remember the special feeling of having our whole family in the temple. I was nervous to kiss Paul in front of all that family...I grabbed his face and gave him a kiss. I didn't want a long drawn out slobbery kiss, so I took some initiative. Funny, that Paul was worried about me not showing up and I was worried about kissing him in front of people.

Here we are 7 years later. I have changed (or at least tried to) and Paul has changed. Our kids have changed us. I often think about when Eden was little. I would get on Paul over EVERYTHING...banging the cupboards, slurping his cereal, handling the baby too rough, calling me too many times a day, watching tv, spending money, not listening, taking long showers, staying up late, shopping at Shopko, not paying attention in church, etc. etc. etc.

I was blessed to marry such a wonderful man who is grateful for me. He has always been grateful for me. He wasn't too picky, he was just so thankful to finally be getting married. I recall our first year of marriage I wanted to communicate more. I made a big list of things that bothered me. Things I wanted to discuss because they were important :). After I was done spilling my guts I asked him if there were things about me that I could change. I expected him to have a similar list. He had nothing. He said I was perfect. Now looking back I think he was just trying to end the conversation as soon as possible. Paul is not one for lengthy talks about feelings. He has taught me to look beyond the moment. To not be so serious and intense...especially when it comes to things that bother me. I have watched him grow into fatherhood. He has had to make a lot of adjustments these past 7 years. I love him for it. I will always love him. I choose to marry him. It was a good choice.

More adventures await us. What will 7 more years bring?

Twin boys

We were completely surprised to find out there are twin boys inside my belly!

Here is Paul's version:

Cyndi asked me to go to the ultrasound to find out the sex of the baby. So, Eden, I and Mommy went to the doctor’s office last Wednesday. We checked in and they led us back to the ultrasound room. While Cyndi was getting ready, the secretary came back and asked us if we had brought our insurance card. Cyndi said that she had left it in the car and I volunteered to go get it. While I was gone, the technician put the ultrasound stick on Cyndi’s belly to get an preliminary shot of the baby. Two heads immediately popped on the screen (which Cyndi saw) and the technician immediately said, Umm, “let’s wait for your husband to get back before we start.” When I returned the technician asked us if we had a history of twins in our family? We said “No” and then she said, “well, there’s two of them in there.” I immediately started to unravel internally. Outwardly, I just sat there stunned and speechless, but internally, a feeling of fear and denial started growing uncontrollably. After she informed us of the babies are boys, I started interrogating the technician in an effort to discover some flaw or defect in her diagnosis. Cyndi could tell I was about to lose it so she tried to calm me down. Flatly, I am still shocked! As you can probably figure out, I am already a marginal parent taking care of two girls and boy. But, by adding twin boys to the mix, I have serious reservations to my ability to parent successfully, not to mention my ability to maintain my sanity. To make matters worse, I am not even carrying the babies. That’s Cyndi’s job. Obviously, she has it way worse than I do, so I need to get my act together. Since Wednesday, I have come to terms with the idea of having twins. I would be lying if I were to say I am not excited. I am still worried about the financial challenges twins bring, but wrestling twin boys sounds like a lot of fun. Even today, I spent most of church daydreaming about them, thinking of names and playing the role of “proud papa” to my friends.